Struggling today.

  • Thats all. If you are too, well you’re not alone.

    I look forward to watching games with you guys.

  • @approxinfinity you better be ok! I certainly care about you, and need you. You are one of my unknown shoulders! 😳eat some 🎂

  • @Crimsonorblue22 haha thanks. I ate some Kapow Jae from my favorite Thai restaurant. Spicy food helps me when Im in a funk. Its like exercise without the effort.

  • @approxinfinity I thought you or somebody had bad health news! Which I’m glad!

  • @approxinfinity you know this mental health thing too?

  • How many of us do…🤔

  • @Crimsonorblue22 Ive been not great mentally for a while. Today just sucked. This world is a dark place, and i appreciate the friends and family i have.

  • @approxinfinity This was amazing timing for me. Thanks for giving me a space to vent.

    I have been working non-stop 80 hour weeks for over a month. Full disclosure, I am an accountant and so this is our audit time so it is crazier than usual. I recently got a big promotion at work. I actually had the option to stay where I am or take a new job, and both were huge pay raises.

    The job I didn’t take paid a little less, had worse benefits, and was less overall responsibility.

    The job I took pays a little more, has amazing benefits, and puts me on a course to future success and financial security.

    The last month I’ve been questioning this decision non-stop. I’ve literally broken down in tears twice in the last week from being so overwhelmed, and all I can think about is that I think that there is a kcmatt in a parallel universe who took the other job and is much happier.

    I would quit, but I just hired two people who I basically hand-picked recruited to come over. So all I can do right now is bury my head and push forward. And it will get better… I just don’t really know when. As soon as the audit is over, I have to catch back up. I have over 400 unanswered emails. I have my usual monthly/weekly/quarterly things to do. It is just complete chaos.

    Anyways, wish me luck these coming weeks. I honestly I feel worse for my wife… We’ve been married for 38 days and I’ve barely seen her since the honeymoon. She’s been great and understanding, but I know it has to be wearing on her too.

  • @Kcmatt7 i feel you man. Thats crazy hours. Im not doing anything like that, but i recently switched employers after 9 years with the last place and the new place has been tough. I was tasked with tearing down what i built at the old place and my future there wasnt something i wanted any more. But the new place hasnt been great: a lot of things have gone poorly and i dont feel confident about my role here. Its not a great time to be an android developer, because Google is embracing the use of web in their apps. The logical progression if i want to stay a native developer is to crossover to ios. But all this churn and constant uncertainty and learning can be a lot. Anyway, i feel you on the work stress, and im thankful to have a good job.

  • Sorry guys! Surround yourself with good people!

  • I’m setting myself up for a lot of ridicule and criticism, but - it’s worth it. If you’re a Christian, now is the time to really lean in and lean on Him. This world is not a surprise to Him and it’s not more than He can handle. He can take your cares and worries and fears and give you peace and joy and strength.

    1 Peter 5:7 Casting all your cares on him, for He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:10 But may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you.

    If you’re not a Christian - today’s a very good day to consider it. I was strictly anti-Christian until I was 32. Things changed and now I sleep at night. I have peace. I am not afraid. I’m not perfect, I don’t like the way things are going in the world today, but I try not to dwell on the negative and keep my focus on Him.

  • Mental health is a huge issue right now.

    Life in general is a real grind right now, so I definitely understand the struggle. My wife is contemplating a job change herself right now, so I understand where @Kcmatt7 is coming from as she navigates that. Lots of stressors out there.

    Take care of yourselves, everyone. And if you need to, take a day or a week or a weekend off to do nothing. It’s a grind and I think more of us are closer to the end of our rope than we realize. It’s okay to take a step back for a second to catch your breath.

  • Been seeing almost all my friends getting divorced. A few holding on. Lockdowns were very difficult.

  • Fiance’s job is home care providing & at the time of the lockdowns we had an extremely autistic person living with us. For basically 6 months after we felt like we were on an abandoned island with no support, no where to run and no where to get away and simply breathe. Unfortunately we could not take it anymore and the person had to leave our home. For the next few months we felt like we had severe trauma from dealing with that situation. Now we are getting our 4 year old ready for Pre-K and the stress is high with this Delta strain. We have some comfort in living in the state with the highest vaccination rates but that doesn’t account for kids. Our son needs the structure and interaction he’ll get from school but we are very afraid of sending him somewhere where he might come home with covid & we’ll feel responsible. Thought we were getting to the point where we could manage this virus but man its hard to find the light right now

  • @BeddieKU23 I hear you about the school strain with the little one. We kept our 2 1/2 year old out of daycare for the better part of this last year, and that made work pretty challenging, since my wife and I both work. I’m glad he’s back at school now, and they have to wear masks in his class, but its pretty scary.

    My son has also been climbing into bed at 5 am and not going to sleep until 11 some nights. I don’t remember this being so touhg a thing 10 years ago with the older ones when COVID wasnt happening…

    I have been working at my new job for almost a month now, and in the office for the last 3 weeks. The last 2 days have been easily the best so far. I really appreciate you guys all sharing your stories.

    I’m trying to remember how to get into a zone mentally at work. It has felt like a force field keeping me out. Not the last 2 days.

  • It should be a choice to send your kid to school physically or do remote learning.

  • @BShark it should. but for us, we didn’t think it was the best thing, because of how important the structure and interaction (same ass @BeddieKU23) is for him at this point in his life. luckily, we live in a state with a pretty high vax rate too, and his schools classroom is small, and everyone including the kids wear masks. I would not have thought it possiblef or all the 2 year olds to wear masks all day, but they do.

    These are the best of circumstances, and its definitely worse in situations where the kids have no protection. I don’t understand how public masks isnt a thing already. Just stupid.

  • Lil kids do better, it’s the parents that cause the problems. Have you seen the Tennessee video of the school board meeting?

  • @Crimsonorblue22 I mean. I have nothing nice to say about anti-maskers. I’m just tired of them.

  • @approxinfinity

    Thanks for sharing! I cannot imagine how difficult it is for both parents to be working full time with everything the past year. Seriously I give you all the props in the world for making it work ( and for everyone else who may be in a similar situation).

    We struggled when he was young to have consistent daycare so my Fiance made the decision to get into Home Care Providing which meant we didn’t need Daycare anymore and given what happened last year and is still going on it was a good decision to avoid that stress because before it was a daily struggle. However this line of work doesn’t come without great sacrifice, we have given up our privacy and our home to someone else. We got a very difficult person that just drained the mental goodness out of us and could have easily ruined our relationship if we weren’t so patient and laid back. You add in the lockdowns and not being able to give that person structure (just a like a young kid needs) & we felt literally trapped. We had to move on from that person & 5 months later we got someone else who’s a lot less daily stress and much easier to deal with so we are thankful.

    So my son has been home with Mom for basically his whole life and now we are ready to let him spread his wings. We debated just waiting until he was old enough for Kindergarten because we have sort of home schooled him the past year & he’s excelled but we want him to enjoy being with other kids & the structure that will provide. He’s a night owl as well so we are hoping school will kind of change his routine around going forward. He also sleeps in our room (in his own bed), definitely a comfort thing for him to be close to Mom. We have tried for months to get him back into his room but kids are not easily jedi mind tricked as I’m sure your well aware of.

    Hopefully our fears are just normal anxiety. I think we struggle with we won’t be controlling his environment for the first time especially with the Pandemic. I never would have thought a few years back that when he was getting ready for school that this would be what he’d be dealing with. Poor kids.

  • No matter what Faith/Religion one follows, even who do not believe in one, Keep up the Faith.

    Mental Health and Depression is Real.

    What helps me deal with depression and anxiety is Faith in the Creator.

  • @approxinfinity @Kcmatt7 While no one can really understand your challenges, I am 100% confident that you will come out of the circumstances and the future will be brighter.

    I have absolutely no doubt.

    It is easier said than done, just take one day at a time.

    My intention is not to highlight any Faith, just describing how my belief has helped in dealing with similar situations.

    Below is a verse from the scripture I follow, actually this verse is duplicated to provide greater emphasis.

    So, Verily, With Every Difficulty, There is Relief.

  • Personally feeling a little better. This positivity rate though. Going to be a rough winter for all.

  • @approxinfinity said in Struggling today.:

    Personally feeling a little better. This positivity rate though. Going to be a rough winter for all.

    At this point I am just assuming I will get the delta variant. Hopefully my body/the vax fights it off.

  • @BShark I’m worried about it.

  • @BShark It is highly likely at this point I think… And yea the winter is going to be brutal. I’m expecting lockdowns again. But the funny thing to me is all these work places are having people come back as if they aren’t going to be sending everyone right back home in 2-3 months.

  • @Kcmatt7 said in Struggling today.:

    @BShark It is highly likely at this point I think… And yea the winter is going to be brutal. I’m expecting lockdowns again. But the funny thing to me is all these work places are having people come back as if they aren’t going to be sending everyone right back home in 2-3 months.

    It’s a tough situation. Many people have to work or they won’t be able to eat then you have the situation where the supreme court overturned the eviction moratorium.

  • @Kcmatt7 said in Struggling today.:

    @BShark It is highly likely at this point I think… And yea the winter is going to be brutal. I’m expecting lockdowns again. But the funny thing to me is all these work places are having people come back as if they aren’t going to be sending everyone right back home in 2-3 months.

    I have a good buddy that said he went back to the office for ONE week and then they went remote again.

  • @BShark said in Struggling today.:

    then you have the situation where the supreme court overturned the eviction moratorium.

    I know several people who used the moratorium to stop paying mortgages even though they had the money. Saw a new car, heard of vacations… A mistake that has now left them scrambling. Financial acumen is apparently not innate.

    The SCt decision was inevitable. Kavanaugh said the moratorium had to be done by Congress. CDC doing it to keep people from having to move into more densely occupied housing was tenuous at best, and really it was a subterfuge to give a break to renters from a horrible financial crisis. The notion that a different group (landlords) had to foot the bill, and even possibly lose their own property (many rented houses still have a mortgage being paid by the landlord). Only about 1/8 of funds targeted for rental assistance has been distributed due to bureaucratic bungling.

    The whole system in a mess, with high property prices and ever-lower-paying jobs leaving way too many people vulnerable. A moratorium should have only been a short term solution, but with most of the country opening up with people getting out in the world by the millions, the CDC’s predicate emergency to avoid infections in some homes is likely just the proverbial single drop in a storm.

  • @BShark I guess I mean more like office workers. Seems silly to me.

    I know a local family owner business that forced people back this week and 3 notices from GOOD employees have been put in. The place is about to turn upside down

  • @mayjay It really is a shame that there were bad apples doing things like that.

    @Kcmatt7 Yeah anywhere that can be doing things remotely should be.

  • @BShark said in Struggling today.:

    It really is a shame that there were bad apples doing things like that.

    Happened also with so many businesses that took covid emergency loans and laid off staff anyway.

  • I just noticed this thread of comments. Sports takes a back seat to life and this shows it. Sorry for the tough times. I’ve been adjusting to going back to work, in person, full classrooms full of 6th graders who are none too interested in covering those cute little faces. A sinking suspicion as some have mentioned we’ll end up back teaching from home. I’ve really got it pretty easy to be honest. Short workday, some work at home to do of course, but really pretty chill about it. As always the new kids come in and grab your heart for a variety of reasons, while some of course get your goat instead!

  • @wissox my boy is a rising 7th grader. 6th grade was a tough transition last year. New school, didnt know anyone, suddenly remote and didn’t really get to meet any new friends. While i condoned remote learning for him, and he just got his first shot a few weeks ago, it was at times pretty lonely and frustrating.

    Thanks for being there for them.

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